Broken
by A Tiger's Fire
Summary: "Do you dare to call me weak, now?" This one-shot follows the story of Shadowfrost, who had been scorned all her life for being born with a twisted paw. Gradually, she drifts away, beginning to doubt everything she had ever known. Finally, it comes down to one decision: to live or to die. And after making her choice, she realizes, "I had been broken, but now, I was whole again."


**Hello! This is a _Warriors_ one-shot that I wrote, obviously. It tells the story of a cat who considers herself "broken" on the outside as well as on the inside, and she realizes that she has a choice that only she can make in the end: to live or to die.**

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If there was a way to change fate and destiny, how many creatures would do it? If fate hadn't been as cruel as it was, laid out by the warrior ancestors of StarClan, perhaps _a certain she-cat_ might not have been granted the "imperfection" she had, and maybe she wouldn't have come out of her life with a heart of bitterness, hatred, and resentment.

She might have just broken down under the weight of the scorn and disgust that radiated off most cats as she passed by, but she couldn't, she _wouldn't._ Instead, the mocking attitude of others sparked an anger within her that drove her to be the very best she could - in fact, she achieved her goal, but not in the way she had imagined. She became the strongest, fiercest warrior in the clan, if not all the clans, but you didn't expect it to end so easily, did you? No, though she achieved what she wanted, the anger didn't leave her.

Her name was Shadowfrost, and this is her story.

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My name is Shadowpaw. Shadowpaw of ThunderClan.

I had been born with the twisted foot, and I could do nothing about it. Others, however, used this to scorn me every time I merely walked past them. Those who might _anyway_ have disliked me, simply used this to their advantage, bringing up the point of my twisted forepaw almost every day.

Even my _name_ doesn't fit.

I'm a ThunderClan cat, so why is my name the same as the name of the creator of ShadowClan, ThunderClan's rival? I would have preferred _Twist_ paw over this; Shadowpaw simply reminds me of the shadows that every other cat casts over me, at every moment of every day, when I walk, speak, move, or anything of the sort.

But my twisted foot doesn't _weaken_ me in any way. It, in fact, makes me feel stronger than ever. At every mention of my twisted paw, it feels as if something inside me has been ignited, and a fire blazes inside, causing me to feel strength surge through me.

And, strangely, I can run, with the speed of a WindClan cat, even though I have a twisted paw. Originally, I was just a kit who couldn't even walk without having pain shoot through her paw. But now, I've learned how to walk, and even run. So I'm a ThunderClan cat with a ShadowClan cat's name, and a WindClan cat's speed. It's just ridiculous.

And those _looks_ that I get, day in and day out... the clan doesn't know how it actually feels. Though my paw never hurts anymore, it feels as though the inside of it will burst every time anyone scorns me. But why? I reach the same capabilities as all of the other apprentices; I'm faster than Swiftpaw, stronger than Lionpaw, and stealthier than Nightpaw. What more do they want of me?

Perhaps it's because they never thought a cat with a _twisted paw_ could do so much. But they don't understand how it feels to me. It hurts; it really does. But I can only show it in the form of my anger, and when I become the greatest warrior in the clans.

Ah, Silverstar recently gave me my warrior name. I'm Shadowfrost, now.

I'm a warrior, and now I hold the same title as most cats in the clan. But still, I'm never treated as a warrior; I'm treated as a piece of foxdung that found its way into the depths of the ThunderClan camp. Is that really fair?

I feel no pain now, just anger. Anger, hatred, and... a slight fear. Not fear at the cats who hurl insults at me every day, but at myself. I can't help but think that I have become nothing but a killer, a name to be scorned and hated by all of the clans.

When I go into battle, I'm vicious and ruthless. Every cat fears my strength. I achieved what I had set out to achieve, but at what cost? No one wants _anything_ to do with me, anymore. No cat wants to be in my presence. They no longer doubt the abilities of what a cat with a twisted paw can do, but it seems as though I have just made it worse for myself.

No one speaks to me anymore. My world is deathly silent. It frightens me at times, making me feel as though I am always being watched.

But why? Why did StarClan oh-so-kindly gift me with a distict feature that would scar me, and leave me in pain and anger throughout my life? My life has been thrown away. I never surrendered or gave in to my twisted paw; still, I cannot push it away and ask it to leave me alone, as it plagues me, every day.

While some wounds are those that signify the loss encountered during a fierce battle, such as a scar, or a permanent limp, others are scars that streak across the heart, torturing it every day as it tries to break free. But now, I ask myself, which is worse? I, myself, would much rather have a permanent limp, which I do, in a sense. But I can run, and fast, can't I? Was _that_ what StarClan gives me, to make up for the severe loss I face?

Pathetic.

I have lost all respect I ever had for StarClan. My warrior ancestors took everything I could have had away from me with a single decision: the choice to give me a twisted paw that would destroy me from the inside.

Now, I can only recall two things: run and fight. I don't quite remember anything else, none of the scorns, no cats... I sleep out in the forest every night, now, and I grow more and more distant from ThunderClan. But I can run, and I can fight. But what is left of my spirit? Do I even have a heart anymore? A soul? A spirit worthy of life?

I doubt it.

I cannot imagine joining StarClan, after I refused to believe that they wished the best for every cat. But... could I? They say it's a lovely place to be in. But would they deem me worthy? Maybe, and maybe not.

Perhaps they would bring the memories of the mockery from others back into my mind, by unleashing their own. Every spiteful word makes me flinch. Inside, it feels as though claws are ripping into my heart. But they are _StarClan,_ aren't they? The group of cats everyone deems to be so great?

Oh, I remember now, they are the cats who gave me my twisted paw. So is it fair for them to scorn me for something that was _their fault?_ I doubt that even StarClan could be so cruel.

But now I am faced with a question that has been mildly present ever since my birth: should I continue on with my life? Or should I join the spirits, leaving a world of pain and torture behind? They say that living takes a lot of courage. But it also takes an equal amount of courage to face death and tell it that you wish to embark on a new adventure among the spirits.

Silverstar has made me deputy, now. Did I do anything to deserve it? Most of the clan is against this decision, and they believe they should attack me, since Silverstar has greencough. But I doubt that they would truly risk something like that. I am too strong, too fierce.

Ah, they chose to go forth with this plot... but I was ready. I was bleeding, wounded, and exhausted, but I came out _alive._

They left multiple scars on me, both on my heart and on my sleek black pelt, and all in one moment, I wish that I had never been a part of ThunderClan. Maybe, if StarClan hadn't chosen to bring me to life, it would have all been different.

I visited Silverstar to ask her why she made the choice of making me her deputy. She said that it was because I was an excellent fighter. But what was more interesting was that she _also_ said that it was to increase my involvement with the clan. Yes, maybe I wasn't as involved as I could be. But is it fair to expect so much of me, when mockery and scorn is all I get in return?

Silverstar is dead, now, and I am the leader of ThunderClan.

But I refused to take nine lives from the cats that shoved me onto this world with an "imperfection" that caused me so much pain. I never visited the Moonpool, and I chose to live with one life, equal to the rest of my clan.

Now, I realize it. Life is a fragile thing. If it is pushed to one side, it can result in pain and torture. If pushed the other way, it results in jealousy and hatred. I stand, a victim of the first. But life isn't perfect, is it? So... maybe life isn't worth all the pain I've faced.

Who do they think I am? A cat to be pushed around? No. The clans never realized who I truly was capable of being until I became Shadowstar, leader of ThunderClan. But... I choose to give up that title.

Slowly, I pad over to the edge of the lake, staring down into the calm ripples. A jet-black cat with silver-blue eyes stares back at me. If I look closely, I can see the waves of anguish that ripple across the silver-blue gaze, just like the lake at my paws. That cat is... me.

I speak, my voice icily steady and calm as I lift my head challengingly. My voice is cold and hard, but laced with all the emotion that I have ever felt throughout my lifetime. "Do you dare to call me weak, now?"

Without another word, I slowly pad closer to the lake, and fling myself into the blue water. I allow myself to go limp, feeling the water suck my breath from me as the life drains from my slender, but strong, body. The waves drag me down, where I sink into the depths. But my spirit floats up, blinking at my territory one last time before padding away to walk amongst the stars.

I had been broken, but now, I was whole again.

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 **I hope you enjoyed this! Please review!**

 **~A Tiger's Fire**


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